Dear Prudence is Slate’s advice column. Delia Cai is filling in as Prudie for Jenée Desmond-Harris while she’s on parental leave. Submit questions here.
Dear Prudence,
I’ve been married for 23 years and we have a 10-year-old. Our relationship has not been what I hoped for. It’s been so hard! We did years of couples counseling before we had a child. Since I became pregnant, we do not have any physical intimacy, which stems from him. I just found out that my spouse racked up $100,000 of credit card debt because he “was depressed.” Thankfully none in my name. We separated our finances immediately. I’m so mad. We’ve had separate bedrooms for five years. We don’t argue in front of our child and work…
